self-portrait ideas

this is going to be a running list, that i will add to continually, and is, of course, merely an outline and proposed ideas:

all theory, no action
-will be very abstract in form
-montage-esque
-perhaps delve into childhood, but more or less focus on the state of now
-will include sound bites from certain movies
-will include pictures from my past (past speaks for the present?)
-will include video, shot specifically for this project
-will include audio of me reading from selected journals and thoughts that actually made it onto paper

background selection/initial construction
-much like my dreams. or daily reality. (?) abstract, nonsensical, and connective. very strange.
-montage-esque. (again. highly important. all i know.)
-having second thoughts of including audio of myself. i never like how i sound on video, i think that would lead me to be less happy with the final project. maybe instead it'll be a hard copy (to be read by viewer) in conjunction with music?
-will include the major battles i've fought in my life, which have, by far, led me to "me" more than anything else
-essential goal: to splash my brain (and heart) into a timeline in fcp, then cut it up and make it watchable

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it's turning into something very different. like a puzzle, how it all comes together, when you just let it.
10.16.08 00:00

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fuck! it just came to me. and thats what its called. not it just came to me. fuck! you'll see it later.

much different than i thought.
12:11

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ok, so this is beginning to be much different than i had originally, (or secondly) thought... my first idea was ok. my second idea was my favorite. and now, whats its shaping up to become is not exactly what i had in mind... i don't hate it, but i don't love it. due to time constraints, idea two is out of the question. i tried it, but i would have to do another entire shoot, and then start editing... and since the project is due in T-minus 6 days, thats pretty much impossible. (i have had huge problems with both, thus far) i'm not all that far into the editing process, but since i'm supposed to be moving this weekend, theres just no time. plus, tony's equipment request reply said "OK Jordan" and lo and behold, i get there today, and... no mics! i'm not sure why the universe (or tony) doesn't want me to finish this project, but it's getting a bit frustrating... anyhow, like the second ideas theme, i'm kind of having to let this project take its own shape, and go in the direction it wants, while i just act as a moderator. i just hope it ends up ok.

10.31.08 9:04 pm

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oh shit! ok, so... last night, after i posted that last comment, i made some serious changes. like, to the whole thing. since up to this point, most of my 'action' (referring to the theory/action balance) has been from behind the camera and not yet into FCP, it's not a huge deal. because it's not like i've scrapped tons of hours of editing. part of the reason i haven't started editing yet is because i wasn't fully happy with what i had. so... since my project relies on the audio (meaning i have to get the audio track down before i can really get to the video track, for a few reasons) and i was never happy with what the audio was turning into, i switched it up. i had the right idea last time, but i did the wrong thing. so this time, i figured out what the idea actually was, and did that instead. (sounds simple right? yea, not in my life...) so, now that i'm finally on the right track (and it's already freakin' saturday. geez) i gotta pull this one off quick. so, amidst a rather severe sinus infection (NOT good for my audio recording, very nasal) and a move into a new place, i guess we'll see...

p.s. per your comment, about making it about one idea or one event... i just don't know if i could do that... although maybe, the one idea is actually about how weird i am...

11.01.08 9:22am


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so, i'm finally starting to put this shit together....after hours and hours of recording, importing, and sifting through everything i just recorded (and when it's about 15 hours of footage, thats tough. plus, i just hit "capture now" and so everything is named the same thing) i'm getting a bit jaded. but finally, starting to build up the landscape. audio first, then video. and i guess we'll see where it goes... right now, it's becoming a bit of a technological vs. natural landscape, centered around my dad's death (what would be my pre- and post- life wars). strange. who knows...

11.03.08 3:40am